Hello Sweetie,
apologies for being AWOL but as you will now know from last night's conversation, the new job has taken over my life for the time being. I will go into more detail but for now, a brief overview.
So, I'm three weeks into the new job. Initial impression is... really nice people, I'm on a small team, now a team of four... including me, which is attached to a larger team. My initial team are all lovely, two gents and my immediate boss is a female, an engaging and laid back woman of Irish decent. There is nothing like the Irish accent, I've long been a fan and lovely to hear that lilt every day. It's very calming.
The work, is like nothing I've ever done before, I'm now all spreadsheets, numbers, pivot tables and reports and I can't tell you how much my brain aches.
My commute time is now into hours, I would guess two hours a day on average, on a good day, in rush hour traffic.... in the pitch dark.
Between the commute, in the dark, in rush hour traffic and the numbers, spreadsheets etc, my brain is well and truly poached by the time I put my key into my front door.
I am making copious notes while my extremely patient "buddy" Pete, explains everything, step by painful step, he is such a whizz but thankfully, also patient and never makes me feel stupid, (I do that all on my own.) Eventually, (I think they are talking in weeks rather than years,) I will take over Pete's duties, God willing. I am so, out of my depth.
I'm really not sure why they hired me, I think there must have been a mistake somewhere along the line and it's only a matter of time before I'm found out.
Saturday, 23 November 2013
Sunday, 10 November 2013
Newbie
Needless to say, I hardly slept on Sunday night in preparation for the commencement of my next chapter. Incidentally, I'm so, "next chapter'd" out, I sincerely hope that this is my last, "next chapter" for a good while.
Truthfully, everyone was lovely and welcoming and there wasn't anyone I didn't like straight away. On the other hand, I feel like they've hired the wrong person. I feel like I'm at least one degree short of even being allowed to converse with these lovely people, and don't even get me stared on the actual work, it's so complicated and I am SO out of my depth.
I had a bit of a chat with my new manager on day one and after a while, she told me to, "relax, you got the job!" I must have just oozed panic from my face.
By Wednesday, I knew that I couldn't sustain the panic. I gave myself a good talking to and resolved to study study study.
My working week has been turned upside down. Where I used to work until 2.30pm and have a ten minute journey home, I am now required to work until at least 4pm, but so far, I haven't finished until 4.15pm at the earliest, which means my hour long journey home lands slap bang in the middle of rush hour, which transforms my journey to around 75 minutes, at least. By the time I get home, I'm too tired to eat and simply long to slip into a coma. And... one day each week, I think I'm going to need to work until 6pm which means I won't be home until 7.
It's far from terrible, it's just different and will take my, (suddenly feeling old body and,) brain, a little time to adjust to the new schedule.
I'm missing a lot of people this week. OK, I'm missing two people. I have always been like this, it's a fault with me. People I connect with on my journey, I wish I could take with me until the end. That's not life though, that's not the case and I really should know by now that some special people in my life, it may only be a transient affair.
Tomorrow is Monday and this morning, I jogged, wearing my Rocky Balboa t-shirt. I'm feeling positive people. This was my lucky break. This is just the start. I need to hold my head high and act the part... until I can acutally live it.
Truthfully, everyone was lovely and welcoming and there wasn't anyone I didn't like straight away. On the other hand, I feel like they've hired the wrong person. I feel like I'm at least one degree short of even being allowed to converse with these lovely people, and don't even get me stared on the actual work, it's so complicated and I am SO out of my depth.
I had a bit of a chat with my new manager on day one and after a while, she told me to, "relax, you got the job!" I must have just oozed panic from my face.
By Wednesday, I knew that I couldn't sustain the panic. I gave myself a good talking to and resolved to study study study.
My working week has been turned upside down. Where I used to work until 2.30pm and have a ten minute journey home, I am now required to work until at least 4pm, but so far, I haven't finished until 4.15pm at the earliest, which means my hour long journey home lands slap bang in the middle of rush hour, which transforms my journey to around 75 minutes, at least. By the time I get home, I'm too tired to eat and simply long to slip into a coma. And... one day each week, I think I'm going to need to work until 6pm which means I won't be home until 7.
It's far from terrible, it's just different and will take my, (suddenly feeling old body and,) brain, a little time to adjust to the new schedule.
I'm missing a lot of people this week. OK, I'm missing two people. I have always been like this, it's a fault with me. People I connect with on my journey, I wish I could take with me until the end. That's not life though, that's not the case and I really should know by now that some special people in my life, it may only be a transient affair.
Tomorrow is Monday and this morning, I jogged, wearing my Rocky Balboa t-shirt. I'm feeling positive people. This was my lucky break. This is just the start. I need to hold my head high and act the part... until I can acutally live it.
Sunday, 3 November 2013
Last Day
My last day at the old job has arrived and I'm keen to get it over with. I hate fuss about me and would quite happily slip out, unnoticed, at the end of the day. I'm not a bit Leonine, am I?
My morning is fragranced by eight bunches of flowers, from lilies to roses to carnations, to more roses and endless "good luck" cards, lip gloss collections, lip balm collections, (they know me so well,) and a beautiful keyring bearing the words of Helen Steiner Rice, chocolates, wine, it went on and on. I have only been there for thirteen months and this is all so unexpected.
I survive the trauma of my "presentation", largely due to the surprise nature of it, (I thought people were getting up to go for lunch and not to gather around my desk,) but mostly due to the laid back, relaxed nature of my manager who made the whole thing both lovely and touching and painless.
Some people you meet in life, we are with them for a fleeting moment, some people you connect with on such a deep level and you wish you could take them with you, but you know that you can't. Some people, I'll miss, forever.
Just before noon, I received an email from my friend Paul who I used to sit next to at my last job, (I'll be returning to the same building three floors higher... for my new job.) "Hello Miss J, are you excited or nervous to be returning home? xx"
He warmed my cockles, and I can't even tell you what he would say to that. I'm nervous but yes, I do feel feel like I'm returning home and even though I'll be working with all new people, I know that I have friends three floors below me. That is quite a comfort.
I wish I could take one person with me, from this job. Life is a journey right? I just hate moving on and leaving behind people that I care about, that's the part I don't like. I wish we could keep everyone that you care about, with us, forever.
My morning is fragranced by eight bunches of flowers, from lilies to roses to carnations, to more roses and endless "good luck" cards, lip gloss collections, lip balm collections, (they know me so well,) and a beautiful keyring bearing the words of Helen Steiner Rice, chocolates, wine, it went on and on. I have only been there for thirteen months and this is all so unexpected.
I survive the trauma of my "presentation", largely due to the surprise nature of it, (I thought people were getting up to go for lunch and not to gather around my desk,) but mostly due to the laid back, relaxed nature of my manager who made the whole thing both lovely and touching and painless.
Some people you meet in life, we are with them for a fleeting moment, some people you connect with on such a deep level and you wish you could take them with you, but you know that you can't. Some people, I'll miss, forever.
Just before noon, I received an email from my friend Paul who I used to sit next to at my last job, (I'll be returning to the same building three floors higher... for my new job.) "Hello Miss J, are you excited or nervous to be returning home? xx"
He warmed my cockles, and I can't even tell you what he would say to that. I'm nervous but yes, I do feel feel like I'm returning home and even though I'll be working with all new people, I know that I have friends three floors below me. That is quite a comfort.
I wish I could take one person with me, from this job. Life is a journey right? I just hate moving on and leaving behind people that I care about, that's the part I don't like. I wish we could keep everyone that you care about, with us, forever.
Shrink Rap
You know that I analyse. I am an analyser. I'm really keen to get to my new job but there is something bothering me. Some of my colleagues also interviewed for the same job but didn't get it. They did however get some feedback on their interviews and it makes for interesting, (for me,) criticism. One referred to their notes too much. My notes sat armed and ready to fire from my lap, but I didn't look at them once, they're more of a life jacket for the drowning, than a script. One isn't, "corporate" enough. Am I corporate? I didn't know I was even remotely corporate. Does that mean I've been brainwashed?
Since I found out that I got the job, I've joked that they've phoned the wrong person, (as the day of reckoning was fraught with comedic errors.) Still, I was only half joking, I really don't know why they offered me the job. What did they see, that I don't?
I can't help wondering if my answers to diversity rallied my cause. You know those sayings that, "all roads lead to Rome," and, "God doesn't give you more than you can handle." And now, in retrospect when I was asked in my interview, how it felt to stand in for the next grade up for two years, only to have the job not be advertised but for three people to be slotted into the job I was covering and for me to train them to do the job I'd been doing for two years, or for me to move to another department closer to home, then after six weeks to be told that the building is being closed in favour of an office that is further away than the one I was in six weeks ago?
You know me, I'm such a hot head, but with a little time and the grace of reflection, I can give a considered and I suppose, an optimistic answer?
I don't mean to blow my own trumpet but from what I've heard, "the bar was set high." Which only worries me more. I hope to God that I'm up to the job and that I don't get, "found out." My only consolation is that, a few years ago, when I acted up to this grade. My boss, was a fair but no nonsense woman. She was, is, quite a hard task master and I have no doubt in my mind, that if I wasn't doing a good job then, she would not have put up with me for long and I would have been replaced, quickly and clinically.
Knowing that my then boss had such high standards, makes me think that I was doing an OK job. I think that's all I can take with me, unless I pluck up the courage to ask them why they offered me the job, but then, I'm not sure that I should show any doubt. I should just, turn up, and look and act the part right?
Since I found out that I got the job, I've joked that they've phoned the wrong person, (as the day of reckoning was fraught with comedic errors.) Still, I was only half joking, I really don't know why they offered me the job. What did they see, that I don't?
I can't help wondering if my answers to diversity rallied my cause. You know those sayings that, "all roads lead to Rome," and, "God doesn't give you more than you can handle." And now, in retrospect when I was asked in my interview, how it felt to stand in for the next grade up for two years, only to have the job not be advertised but for three people to be slotted into the job I was covering and for me to train them to do the job I'd been doing for two years, or for me to move to another department closer to home, then after six weeks to be told that the building is being closed in favour of an office that is further away than the one I was in six weeks ago?
You know me, I'm such a hot head, but with a little time and the grace of reflection, I can give a considered and I suppose, an optimistic answer?
I don't mean to blow my own trumpet but from what I've heard, "the bar was set high." Which only worries me more. I hope to God that I'm up to the job and that I don't get, "found out." My only consolation is that, a few years ago, when I acted up to this grade. My boss, was a fair but no nonsense woman. She was, is, quite a hard task master and I have no doubt in my mind, that if I wasn't doing a good job then, she would not have put up with me for long and I would have been replaced, quickly and clinically.
Knowing that my then boss had such high standards, makes me think that I was doing an OK job. I think that's all I can take with me, unless I pluck up the courage to ask them why they offered me the job, but then, I'm not sure that I should show any doubt. I should just, turn up, and look and act the part right?
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